ABC Reality Show, Bachelor

By Larry Chiang

I am the guy getting recruited for ABC’s bachelor.

My theatrical agent would disown me (more) if I did it. But that doesn’t keep my Shih Tzu like sponge brain from soaking up mentorship. You see, if I might do something, I’m going to be a Chinese dog named Baxter and start collecting data.

I’m talking about doing homework for a class I’m not taking.

What do I mean?!

Like in the movie “Limitless” where Bradley Cooper takes and applies ‘an odd museum show’, ‘some half read book on a coffee table of a girl I was trying to mate’ or “watching Bruce Lee”. Information can be collected and coagulated into a cocktail of awesome.

Drink it.

Here is what I’d pay attention to. Watch out for. Countermeasure. IF I WERE TO DO BACHELOR TV show.

-1- Late, late night shoots.

More drama happens at night when you’re tired and your energy is depleted.

SAG rules can’t help you with your 4am shootings that go super late. Sag is screen actors guild.

-2- Food shortage.

I eat so often on shoots that I charm the catering staff to give me more food. It’s why I know everyones name.

My inside source says that bachelorettes and bachelors are starved.

It’s to keep people in interrogation mode.

COUNTERMEASURE: Have a secret stash of chocolate brownie Luna bars and cliff bars crammed down your ‘Larry Chiang Nike Boxer Shorts’.

Food starvation is also meant to…

-3- Accelerate Your Alcohol Intake.

The show wants you on chemical.

There is plenty of alcohol for reality show actors. I am using the term actor very loosely.

You, drunk, makes for better tv.

COUNTERMEASURE: fake drink and just gargle the Jack and spit. Do not swallow. God, if you’re Asian and your tolerance is uber low… Don’t even let the shot touch the lining of your mouth.

-4- Emotional Issue Engage.

You’re on the show because of your propensity to reveal that you have daddy issues.

In the same way a stripper on a pole invariably has some pole accelerant… You were selected for the show based on your psych make-up.

COUNTERMEASURE: like a navy seal who studied under John Reid’s system of legal and illegal interrogation… You better learn to hide a red herring. A red herring is a fake issue.

Get a fake issue to hide a real issue or manufacture an emotional issue if you do not have one.

CEO of Duck9 Stanford University EIR (Entrepreneur in Residence)

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**************** Editor of the BusinessWeek Channel “What They Don’t Teach at Business School” http://whattheydontteachyouatstanfordbusinessschool.com/blog CNN Video Channel: http://ireport.cnn.com/people/larrychiang

Read my last 10 tweets at http://www.Twitter.com/LarryChiang

Author, NY Times Bestseller http://whattheydontteachyouatstanfordbusinessschool.com/blog/?s=Ny+times+bestseller

“What They Will NEVER Teach You at Stanford Business School” comes out 11-11-12

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